20170129_145546.jpgI. Hate. Dirt.

Probably due to forced indentured servitude during my childhood.  I was an underpaid, overworked field hand.  Plain and simple.  And, Big Hank didn’t care about gender, religion, color, age, or biology.  If you ate at the house, you worked in the yard.  (ask my friends, and our poor poor exchange student)

When I was married, the yard fell to Jake.  (yeah, I’m a feminist that hates dirt, deal).  When I divorced, the yard fell to Dane.  Following Dane’s departure for school, various hired yard men, yard women, yard teen-agers, and, I am somewhat embarrassed to admit, lovers took over the yard.  (I may or may not have stayed too long in more than one relationship for the yard services.)

February 2016:  Enter BLUE ZONES.  One of my many takeaways?  People who live a long and lovely life?  They tend to garden.  UGH.  Apparently, the moving, stretching, sunshine, fresh produce, and even the very DIRT itself, is good.

I tried.  I really did.  But eventually, Juan Carlos (lawn guy) and Elisa (Plant goddess) won out.  I love having a beautiful yard, but, as previously stated, I hate dirt.

January 8, 2017:  I discovered Square Foot Gardening at the Holistic Fair.  I was intrigued, but not enough to pull the trigger and get in the dirt.

January 29, 2017:  I’m minding my own business, walking and listening to Dr. Josh Axe’s  “Eat Dirt: Why Leaky Gut May Be the Root Cause of Your Health Problems and 5 Surprising Steps to Cure It.”  (I downloaded it from the Fort Worth Public Library and we all know good things happen at the library).  Dammit, Dr. Axe said to get into the dirt.  It’s good for my gut and my microbiome.  And to be quite honest, since the holidays, my gut, and as a result, my body, have been all kinds of messed up.  Gluten, sugar, too much meat, stress, poor sleep, and unicorn hunting have all led to inflammation, pain, and fatigue.

So, TODAY, at approximately 12pm, I got out into the yard, and I got dirty.

  1.  The painters had broken the faucet in the back yard on Friday, and had neglected to inform me, so there was a swamp.  If I had NOT gone to get dirty, I may have not noticed this for a LOT longer, as I don’t go back there much.  So, dirt one, Laura being stubborn, zero.
  2. I dug up and turned over old mulch in ONE bed.  Not horrible.  I did not die.
  3. I planted 15 primroses, which had been purchased for .49 each at ALDI.  Pretty and cheap.  Just like me.  (wait….)
  4. I planted 5 daffodil bulbs.  Purchased in a last week at Kroger in a pretty pot for 2.99.   I got to enjoy them on the table for a week, and hopefully in the garden for years to come. Again, I did not die.
  5. Finally, I found that 2 hours had passed, my beds looked pretty, my face was rosy from the sun and exertion, and I felt looser and more relaxed than I have in a few months.

The effects upon my gut and microbiome will obviously take more than a 2 hour romp in the yard.  But, it’s a start.  And the gut actually heals much faster than most people realize.  (It also gets fucked up much faster than most people realize as well, but that’s another post).


Get Dirty.

Light and Love,

Big (dirty) Laura

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